6 - 9 month outfits.

Here is a rather lengthy collection of photos of Eloise's 6 - 9 month wardrobe. We were spoilt for choice these last three months. It freaks me out to no end that we are now onto 9 - 12 month outfits. 12 months as in a year. A year as in my baby is now wearing clothes she will be wearing when she celebrates her first birthday.

Eloise's local organic cotton shirt with local saying "Ay up m'duck!"

Do you know how hard it is to find girls clothes in blue? When I saw this blue sweater with pompoms I didn't think twice about buying it. I want one in my size.

Pink Pirate Skull and Crossbones t-Shirt.

We call this her pimp coat.

Peekaru hat. Cutest turtle baby I ever saw.

Fancy Oilily sweater that I don't allow her to eat in or do messy play in. That shit's expensive (and adorably quirky).

I rarely put Eloise in proper "baby" clothes (she's more of a jeans and t-shirt gal), but this little antique style baby lamb romper makes my heart swoon.

This denim dress was a killer find at a charity shop for £1. Super cheap, durable and cute. She's also wearing her moccasins from Grandma and Grandpa's trip to New Mexico.

The denim dress again paired with my favorite brown cardi purchased in France.

By far Eloise's poshest outfit - Baby Dior!

Hmmm, this is what happens when Daddy dresses Eloise. Purple trousers? Cute. Orange dress? Cute. Together? Not so much.

A fabulous gift from the states - this cupcake sweater comes with brown fleece pants as well. This is my go to outfit when Eloise is feeling sick. It is so cozy, I imagine it is what I would choose to wear if I wasn't feeling myself.

Have you seen this gorgeous coat?

Calvin Klein pyjamas. On sale at TK Maxx.

Hail Beatles!

Lucky number 13. Oh how exhausting it is to be so well dressed.

Getting the laundry done.

One of my favorite activities to do with Eloise is the simple task of hanging up the laundry together.

I'll either put her on a blanket in the garden with some toys while I put the laundry out on the clothes line or better yet I'll put her in the carrier or sling and let her help me. We'll squint our eyes in the sun, Eloise will touch the different fabrics while I attach the clothes with pegs and sing to her.

It's the time of the day I feel most Motherly. And thus the time of the day I am happiest.

Beware lactating readers - your boobs just might cry.

Her pyjamas are too big, mine are the flannel equivalent of a chastity belt, the photo is blurry, his knee is in the shot and you can clearly see that the house is a mess. But this photo makes my uterus finally understand why it had to stretch to 5 times its normal size.

I've got your heart in my sights

9 months and one day. A pretty decent run I guess. I mean any workplace that had employees who lacked object permanence would surely be impressed to go a whole 9 months and a day without an entry in the accident book. So I guess I could feel ok with the fact that I managed to keep you from falling off the bed for just over 9 months of your life. I could feel ok if it weren't for the fact that while you were diving for your freedom off of our bed to the hard wood laminate below I was standing not 4 feet away, hanging up the laundry to dry, serenading you with Elton John and Kiki Dee's 7o's hit Don't go breaking my heart.

Neuvieme mois avec Mademoiselle Eloise

Eloise -

You're sleeping upstairs in your rocker. I am still in my pyjamas and feeling a little fragile from the stomach bug you brought to the family. I have to say you were a very good patient. A little more clingy and cranky sure, but for the most part you kept smiling and wanting cuddles between the projectile vomit.

You've learned how to clap and watching you bang those chubby little hands of yours together warms my heart. You almost never fall over when you're sitting these days, and you're able to pull yourself to a kneeling position. You hold your hands out when you want me to pick you up. You appear to say Dada more around your father and Mama around me.

You at 3 months looking surprised in your jungle mat.

You at 9 months, Queen of the jungle.

My favorite moments recently are putting you to bed after you feed in the night. During the day you're vocal and squirmy and excited and growing. But at night I can pretend that time has stopped and that you will always be my little baby. I nurse you, both of us half asleep. Then when you've had your fill, I pick you up and you nestle your head against my neck, heavy with sleep. I gently sway with you in my arms, breathing you in, a few moments longer than necessary before gently lying you down in your crib.

There will be times in your future that you will be frustrated with me, with the rules I impose which you find unfair, you will fight against me for your independence. And when you yell at me I will be obliged to remind you that I gladly rocked you in my arms at 4am nearly every night for going on 9 months. And I'd gladly do it for 9 more (though feel free to start sleeping through the night before then, really, I'll be ok).

Je t'aime,

Maman

What's a little friendly eye poking amongst friends, right guys?

Buuuuudies.

To night wean or not to night wean

Every night I go through this battle in my head. Eloise has good nights, where she only wakes up once to feed, but those are few and far between. More often than not she has bad nights where she wakes up 4 times. Though I know she doesn't need to eat, in my sleep deprived state I go to the easiest in the short term solution and plonk my boob into her crying mouth so we can all get to sleep again NOW.

While I'm feeding her in her darkened nursery the same argument runs through my mind. She's not even 9 months yet, and a couple experts say that sleeping through the night is a milestone to reach just like sitting up or crawling. Plenty of other books say that by 6 months your baby does not need to feed at night and should be sleeping through. I go back and forth. I know I am creating a habit for her, that she is nursing for comfort and doesn't need the breastmilk (at least not 4 times a night!), but at the same time do I want to put us through a week of sleep training hell if she's just going to get there on her own at some point? And especially as she isn't getting any milk while at nursery I can easily guilt trip myself into feeding her more than she requires.

And if we do decide to night wean, how much crying are we willing to subject our child to?

This would be a lot easier if we were trying for a second child. Then the decision would be made for me - if I want another child, I would HAVE to get Eloise off of the night feeding. (Breastfeeding - especially at night - is a very potent natural form of contraception). I could use the promise of a sibling for Eloise as motivation to handle the sleepless nights. But so far we're holding off on baby number 2.

It's quite impressive how mother nature makes sure that you are sleeping through the night before having another child. Makes perfect sense to me. What I need to know though is whether mother nature is waiting for your baby to get to the point where they no longer need their mom and her milk jugs to sleep or is mother nature waiting for you to prove you are a good enough parent by getting your child the much needed undisturbed night's rest before she grants you a second kid to fuck up love.

Feel free to add your opinion to the mix that is my muddled Mama brain.

Brekkie

Eloise and I had a leisurely breakfast. I made us a bowl of Irish porridge and toasted some soda bread and spread with butter. Eloise enjoyed both. I read left-overs from last weekend's paper that I hadn't got to yet and sipped my cup of coffee while she babbled and concentrated on feeding herself pieces of toast. The morning sun just starting to make it's appearance in the dining room promises a warm spring day ahead. As happens with most meals, lots of pieces fall to the floor and in the sides of the highchair. I look up from the paper to see Eloise looking down at her pyjama clad thigh and reach down to salvage a piece of toast she had just dropped into her lap. I smile at my baby's resourcefulness and take a sip of coffee. But it is not piece of toast she retrieves, it is a green bean. A green bean she had for dinner TWO NIGHTS AGO. A two day old green bean that she proceeds to eat for breakfast.

Parenting FAIL.

Baby's First Easter

A lot of firsts happened this Easter. Our first trip as a family to church. The first time Eloise was blessed by a Vicar. The first time I read a bible passage out to a congregation. The first time Eloise ate chocolate. And not just any chocolate. Good dark chocolate from Daddy's hometown.

I don't want to wear this stupid hat Ma.

Do I look cute in it though?

Hands off my chocolate Mama.

Which to eat first, the chicken or the egg???

I CANNOT DECIDE!!!!@$&#

Oh hot damn that is goooooood.

What do you mean there is no more chocolate.

Happy Easter!!!!!!

A tiny thought

I often wonder how different Eloise would be if she were raised by another set of parents. Would she still have refused to drink from a bottle? Would she be sleeping through the night already? Maybe she would be crawling by now. Would she laugh more? Or less? Weigh more? Most importantly, would she be happier?